Ask A Queer: Gavan Marie

Photo courtesy of Gavan.

Photo courtesy of Gavan.

Today’s queer is Gavan Marie, a seventeen-year-old young woman from the East Bay Area in California. She is currently a senior in high school and is committed to Oberlin College and Conservatory in Ohio as a double degree student in biology and vocal performance for fall 2019. Gavan sings with the Piedmont East Bay Children's Choir and dances at East Bay Dance Center. She’s a book junkie who lives for a good cheesy fiction book or fantasy novel.

You can find Gavan under the handle @gavan.marie on Instagram.

If there is a word you don’t understand in this blog post, you can consult the main page of “Ask A Queer” for definitions. Now let’s get into it! The following responses from Gavan were only edited for clarity. These words and this experience are all hers.

How do you identify? What are your pronouns?

I am a pansexual cisgender female. I use she/her pronouns.

What do you wish people understood about your identity?

I tell people that I’m pansexual and they usually respond with, “Isn’t that the same as bisexual?” and my answer is no. Pansexuality is an attraction to a person for who they are, more than their gender. I don't limit myself because there are beautiful people everywhere. I like the phrase “hearts not parts”!

What can allocishet people do to support your community?

[Allocishet] people can stop invalidating pansexualily. We are just as legitimate and valid as everyone else. A lot of people ask me why I need another label when I’m basically “just a bisexual.” It has gotten to the point where I’ve been telling people that I am bisexual just to avoid those conversations.


What do you love about being queer?

I love being queer because I get to connect on a deeper level with so many people about our struggles and accomplishments within the community! It is very comforting to know that I have a large group of people that I share an identity with.

How do you stay connected to the LGBTQ+ community?

I am in my school’s GSA and I engage with my local LGBTQ+ organizations. I also help educate my friends and family on being sex positive in the community (i.e. disease prevention beyond a stereotypical condom, different definitions of sex).


What does the LGBTQ+ community need to work on? How can they better support your identity?

I think the LGBTQ+ community can work on being more inclusive. I’ve witnessed biphobia and transphobia from out members of the community. We are all unique and we need to be loving towards one another.

Describe your coming out experience.

Coming out was super nerve-racking. With my family and friends, I was worried they wouldn’t accept me or understand me. I was wrong. Everyone was totally okay with it. I was totally blowing my coming out out of proportion.

Photo courtesy of Gavan.

Photo courtesy of Gavan.

What is your favorite piece of LGBTQ+ media?

I love the new movie “Love, Simon.” The story is beautiful and you are always rooting for the main characters. I’ve probably seen it ten times.

Who is your LGBTQ+ role model?

My role model is Natasha Negovanlis. She is the woman who made me realize that I was interested in more that just guys. I started watching the web series, “Carmilla” and fell in love with her and many of the other characters. Ironically, it was introduced to me my best friend, who became my first girlfriend.

Who are your favorite LGBTQ+ celebrities?

My favorite LGBTQ+ celebrities are Billie Eilish, Tyler Oakley, Cara Delevingne (also my eyebrow queen), and Chris Colfer!